Beautiful

{From YouTube}:
New York City Ballet presents NEW BEGINNINGS on September 12, 2013. Filmed at sunrise on the 57th floor of 4WTC in lower Manhattan, this short film captures an extraordinary and moving performance of Christopher Wheeldon's After the Rain. It is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit, and a tribute to the future of the city that New York City Ballet calls home. 

Just thought this was too beautiful to keep to myself.

McAffee Family Reunion

July 26-31, 2013

Portland, Oregon

We spent five full days in beautiful Oregon! 

I was happy to be able to finally bring Mckay to a family reunion, we've been married almost three years and there were so many members of my family who hadn't ever met Mckay! So weird. So we decided that it was time, plus, Portland is just a fun destination which made it all the more alluring.

We arrived late Friday night and finally got into bed around 2am. We spent the next two days "camping" (the Craven/Dunn family rented a cabin) on coast at Pacific City Beach. It was windy and colder than we bargained for, but still so much fun. We explored the tide pools, cooked & ate food together, sat around in camp chairs and visited, swam in the pool, and had a campfire every night. The scenery couldn't have been more beautiful, Oregon is so green and pretty! We visited Pacific City, Tillamook, Portland, Astoria and Seaside while we were there and every place was as breathtaking as the last. Green, lush and gorgeous!

I honestly love camping, a lot. But pregnant Nicki really appreciated a cabin with an air mattress.

The family with cute Grandpa McAffee.

After the reunion ended, our clan stuck around for some extra family time together, which was so great. We went to the Air Museum nearby in honor of my cute little brother who wants to be a pilot.  Somehow, I ended up 1,000 feet in the air in a bi-plane!!! I was torn between loving it, and praying that we'd land safely and in one piece. After about five minutes in the air I was able to relax and enjoy the incredible views.  My favorite thing the pilot pointed out was the pattern the wind made in the fields, talk about the beauty of the earth!

Mckay, Dad, Kenna & Trevor rented dune buggies for a few hours and had a blast driving way too fast (the owner accidentally had the "performance" key in, as opposed to the "practice" key, so they were able to drive these things as if they actually knew what the were doing... the boys loved it. Kenna, not so much. I heard she just did a lot of screaming, "Slow down!")

We did some "enjoy nature" time. I was hungry so that didn't last too long, but the views were pretty.

We spent a day and a night up North in Astoria so that the boys + Kenna could go salmon fishing.  This was an activity I was sad to miss out on, as I really do love ocean fishing, but some activities don't lend themselves to pregnancy very well. Plus, these guys were up at 4am and Mom and I got to sleep in and shop. They were the only 4 on the boat and each caught their limit and were back before lunch time! Such accomplished fishers. Mckay was happy to be back on solid land. My uncle grilled their catch that evening and we enjoyed a five-star meal together in their backyard back in Portland.

I'm told that the small fish my Dad caught put up quite a fight, they were all shocked to see it was such a little guy (who got to go back). Trevor caught the biggest one! 

We also went to the gorgeous Multnomah Falls, hiked a few miles up couldn't make it all the way to the top due to time constraints, bummer. 

Mckay & I ended our trip with an incredible dinner at Departure, a restaurant atop the Nines Hotel in downtown Portland.  We enjoyed our dinner 15 stories up on the roof top, and it was amazing. I found out while in Portland that I passed my boards and am officially an RN, so we decided to celebrate accordingly and were not disappointed.

Unfortunately, there's so much more we did that I didn't capture. 

Reuniting with my favorite cousins after too many years.

Meeting their wives & babies for the first time.

Shopping with my Mom, Aunt & cousin.

Golf for Mckay, Dad & my Uncle Ivan.

The best ice cream from Tillamook.

The maybe even better best ice cream from Salt N Straw.

McAffee group picture.

Mckay and I's day in downtown Portland, a place I would never want to live, I've never seen more bums or more meth-heads in my entire life. 

Fantastic and cheap lunch at the food trucks.

Relaxing time at Uncle Ivan/Aunt Shaunna's house.

We really loved the area (minus downtown) and we really, really loved the company. 

We'll be together at Christmas, +1 tiny, new addition, which is so exciting. Can't wait!

bump progression

For the record, baby is growing!

The day we found out I was pregnant!

Week 10

Week 12

Week 14

Week 16 

-I remember we were headed out to see a movie and I got dressed and was so shocked that I had a belly! It was the funniest thing, I made Mckay take a picture because I thought I looked SOOOO pregnant. Which is funny to me now, because I hardly look bloated compared to the soccer ball I'm carrying out in front these days.

The big half-way mark!

Week 22

Yesterday- Week 24.

Some notes:

Now that I'm not nauseous 24-7 I feel great & I'm loving pregnancy. I didn't feel 100% back to my normal self until about 20 weeks, which was a real disappointment after counting on week 14 to be my magic nausea-be-gone week. However; that yucky time is becoming a distant memory with every kick and move I feel.

I sleep great, I ordered a ridiculous horse-shoe shaped body pillow that I'm obsessed with. Poor Mckay gets about 1/3 of our Queen bed, but I had a bad back/neck before pregnancy and this has done wonders for waking up pain free. 

Of course I'm wearing maternity clothes. I could probably squeeze into some of my old ones but I don't to stretch them out, so I stick to the very small selection of maternity clothes I do have. Mckay got me a belly band to wear with  my normal pants/shorts which I think is just the funniest thing, but I have worn it more than I thought I would, what's one more layer in this stifling heat?

We both feel and see movement all the time. It's pretty special and every time I feel baby move it never ceases to amaze me. Our bodies are so incredible and I am just filled with gratitude and love for our little one.

No food cravings at all this pregnancy. I loved watermelon when I was nauseous but I think that was just because it was cold and had lots of water in it. I've never had the I need this NOW experience I hear about.

We found out that the baby is a BOY! 

We weren't planning on finding out the gender, but at our anatomy scan we had a bit of a language barrier with our sweet tech & she let slip the gender.

So now we are definitely planning on a little guy come November! We were both convinced it was a girl, and the news really shocked us. It definitely took a few hours to adjust our minds (I don't know why we were so set on it being a girl!) to that piece of information... but we are so thrilled (and a little scared) to have a little Mckay Jr. running around.

Now, I was apprehensive to have a 3D scan, in fact, I was totally against it. Mostly because I think the babies always look freaky in them... but look at our sweet little guy! I think he is the handsomest 1lb.+ baby I've ever laid eyes on. We're pretty sure that's my nose and Mckay's mouth but we'll have to see if he looks anything like that when he comes out.  For now, we just drool over the 7 ultrasound pictures we have up on our fridge and attempt to "get ready" for this baby to arrive... 16 more weeks!

Florence

Six years ago, in between semesters in college, I took a job as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) at an assisted living center in Logan, Utah.  It was not glamorous or high-paying, and no one got the jealous sparkle in their eye when I told them what I was doing... "Gross, I don't know how you wipe old people butts all day long!" was a {rude} comment I grew accustomed to hearing.  And although I experienced maybe more than my fair share of less then appetizing situations, the inspiration that seemingly "came out of no where" really changed my life.  I worked there for a few months and left with increased compassion, a bigger heart, a deeper love for an incredible generation, and new life goal: to become a Registered Nurse. I also gathered quite the collection of stories; funny, sad, heart-wrenching, spiritual, gross and scary.  It was the best job I ever had, and it set me on a path that I never doubted was the right one for me.

College, internships, moving across the country, marriage, travel and pregnancy happened in those last six years but in May I was pinned with the rest of my class as a Registered Nurse.

And oh boy, words can hardly express how wonderful that felt.

The history of the pinning ceremony actually dates back to the Crusades of the 12th century, when new monks would come to serve the ill of the Hospital of St. John the Baptist and take an oath to serve the sick & injured. They were presented with a cross, the symbol of Christianity, and vowed a vow dedication.  Over the years, the cross became of coat of arms and has since morphed into an emblem of each nursing program.  The modern ceremony is also heavily influenced by Florence Nightingale  as each student is given a white candle that is lit from the main, burning candle to represent "the Mother of Nursing" and signify the passing of the flame to each new nurse.  We are also presented with a pin from our instructor- symbolically a cross to bear, to show a nurse’s dedication to his/her patients, to advocate for the patient and to serve “long after others have given up hope and gone home”. 
Together, we recite the nursing pledge, blow out our candles and leave the ceremony "registered nurses" (of course we don't talk about the looming NCLEX we need to pass).
It's a beautiful ceremony and very emotional.  

Our Florence Nightingale candle & beautiful flowers.
Getting pinned by one of my favorite professors, big grin! She whispered in my ear when she hugged me, "I hear you have a little secret." It was cute, and a fun moment to be receiving my pin and confirming our happy news of a baby coming our way.

My very best friend for those two incredibly intense years of school, Joy.  Her name suits her perfectly, she is an amazing person, I could go on for days about her special qualities, having 'joy' only scrapes the surface.

And this picture! I cannot even look at it without all sorts of emotions welling up inside of me.  My greatest supporters & three of the people I love very best.  I couldn't have done it without them, I guess I probably could have done it without them, but then again I could live a life without them, and it just wouldn't really be any life at all.  Same with this experience, they were my biggest cheerleaders and it just wouldn't mean as much to me if I didn't have them to share it with.

Love that pin!

I could go on & on about how wonderful this experience of nursing school was (& it truly was, I loved nearly every second of it) and how incredible and dedicated my instructors were (I will owe them forever, for being so invested in me) and how blessed I am for this opportunity, and so many others (Heavenly Father is so good to us).  But I can't, I have to study for the boards :]

On pregnancy

Today I am 15 weeks pregnant, and what an accomplishment that feels like!

We found out we (correction: I. Mckay's pet peeve is when husbands and wives are both pregnant. But I think he's learning that husbands and wives are both pregnant) were pregnant on a Saturday in March. It was the best. We cried and were giddy and kind of just sat there for about an hour with these feelings of awe pouring out of us, it felt surreal and exciting and wonderful and strange.  

Then around six weeks I started to feel some mild nausea. It was uncomfortable but bearable, and not really an inconvenience.  In all my primi-gravida naivety I thought, "This isn't awesome, but totally manageable.  I can totally do this, and do it with a good attitude." And then week 7 hit. And all of a sudden I actually kind of wanted to be put out of misery. I was intensely nauseous all the live-long day. And around week 9 I started throwing up, and getting even sicker at night. All this while somehow managing to keep my eyeballs above the shark infested waters of nursing school.

Everything went to the dogs. My house especially took a beating. It was disgusting. Mckay was in massive amounts of trouble when he actually invited our home teachers over immediately after church one Sunday to a home that looked like wild hyenas had made camp. This wasn't just my-house-is-fairly-clean-but-I'll apologize-and-pretend-it's-disgusting-because- it's-normally-sparkling-and-aromatherapy-ized, this was dirty clothes strewn about, moving boxes, piles of junk, food on the floor, dishes in the sink dirty. It was so bad they actually excused themselves for a minute so we could "tidy up" and I could try and cool my burning red cheeks. 

I didn't cook. I didn't clean. I literally did not grocery shop for over six weeks. I went to class (sometimes) and then came home and got right into bed and Mckay would bring me food that I would try and eat (in bed) and then I'd fall asleep. Or cry and then fall asleep. Or watch "Call the Midwife" and fall asleep.

It really felt like it would never end. As horrible as this is to admit, some days it was incredibly difficult to be happy & grateful. Some days I wondered what the heck we'd been thinking.  Other days were so sweet and even through the nausea and misery there were only tender feelings and happy emotions- like when Mckay would be speeding down I-95 and then hit the breaksand say, "Woah, I better slow down, I'm gonna be a Dad!" or when he'd talk to our little blueberry sized embryo through my softening tummy. Or one morning when my Mom sent us our first teeny-tiny baby outfit with little elephants on it and I thought my heart would burst. 

The weeks slowly but eventually passed, the nausea lifted, and pregnancy amnesia set in because now I think this whole things is practically perfect in every way.

I even did (ahem, attempted) a prenatal yoga video today... and the deep breathing at the beginning felt so good and relaxing that it made me sleepy and then I had to do some pose where my hands were reaching up and I'm squatting down (awkward tree?) and I was like this.is.not.relaxing.only.uncomfortable. So 7 minutes into it I quit and took a nap. But I gave myself a break because I haven't done a stitch of exercise since becoming pregnant. That's on my to-do list. I also threw my only organic, increased fruits & veggies, lean protein, no sugar/white flour pre-pregnancy, pregnancy diet idea out the window reaaaal quick. Because when only grilled cheese sandwiches and watermelon sound good, I only eat grilled cheese sandwiches and watermelon. 

Ch-ch-ch-changes:
There's actually a bitty-bump now which I kind of love.  
I'm still waiting on the super-thick gorgeous hair that is rumored to come, so far I haven't been the recipient of that pregnancy blessing. 
Ever increasing bust size. Some call it curse but I can't for the life of me figure out why.
Fatigue that hits like a ton of bricks (especially when I attempt yoga or house cleaning or reading).
Some pimples, which are as unwelcome now as they were at 15.
Aversions; no salteens, Crest toothepaste, gingerale, teddy grahams or spinach ever again please.  

Things are good. We {three} are very happy.

Our beautiful, talented and smart child at 9 weeks. Look at those cute arm buds!

B is for Baby.

Coming in November & we couldn't be more thrilled.

That time we saw Ben Stiller

It was March 17th.

We were somewhere warm, soaking up the sun during our spring break.

We were eating a delicious & gluttonous steak dinner at about 9:00pm when he walked right through the archway into the back room of the nearly empty restaurant. He had a big smile on his face and was walking fast & before my brain even processed what was happening I blurted out, "Hello Ben Stiller!" in a this-isn't-real-so-he-won't-hear-the-ridiculous-tone-of-my-voice sqeak/squeal.

But it was real.

He sat down for dinner with only an empty table separating us.  

We decided not to be "those fans" and bother him during dinner.

So we finished, paid the bill & went back to our room (for our better camera).  And I maybe put a quick swipe of mascara onto my bare lashes before we went back to camp outside of the restaurant and wait for him to reemerge.  (& get a picture with him on our better camera with my eyelashes standing out!!!).

Much less annoying and creepy.

He came out, but I was freaking out about not being stalker-ish so we hung back and only saw him sitting in the front seat of the car ready to drive away.  

And then he was gone to who knows where, his private villa or something.

Still, a pretty cool story, even with no picture as proof.

So funny to see a celebrity in person.  Even if you think you'll be cool and not even care because Hollywood is so removed from actual society and totally corrupted with too much money for their own good... you will not be cool if it's Ben Stiller.  

He's the best.

We also-

Read books: Outliers (Fascinating!), These Is My Words (Positively heart warming and wonderful), The Glass Castle (Pass; could barely finish it, too depressing) &  Freakonomics (Like).

Explored/took walks and admired the pretty scenery. 

Lazed around next to & swam in the turquoise blue ocean.

We really didn't do much more than that.  Mckay got the worst sunburn of his life on Day 2, so that kind of put a damper on things.  I'll spare you the pictures, just know that a week later he still looked like a ripe tomato, it was so sad.  We also ate too much food (specifically dessert) and stayed up too late watching TV.  It was four days of nothing productive and everything relaxing and leisure and we loved it.

Cap Cana, Dominican Republic

March 16-20, 2013

03.02 happy birthday to me!

This year my birthday was on a Saturday, obviously the very best day of the week on which to have your birthday land.  Mckay gave me the best gift ever, him! All to myself doing everything I love for the entire day. It was the best.  He's been spending most Saturday's at his office studying so it really was such a treat to get to spend the entire weekend together, completely ignoring the books.

He gave me a "card" he'd made that had a sweet birthday note on one side and on the other was our schedule for the day, with pictures for every activity he had planned (all of it was a total surprise to me!).  I believe he made it on PowerPoint, which is so Mckay.  It made me laugh.
 
After making and eating a yummy breakfast together, we got pedicures!  It was awesome.  Once all was said and done, he did not love it. He especially hated them filing his toes (that's what is going on in the above picture).  He also had a lady doing his pedicure, which everyone knows is always second string to a man.  But he wasn't letting a man near his feel, quite the conundrum!  There were a few ladies there, I don't know what they were thinking, but they were staring.  I loved it and thought it was so sweet of him to be a good sport.  Plus, his toes look better than ever and he got to speak a little Korean with the employees.  Later that week he had a dermatology appointment and said, "Do you think if she see's my feet she'll know I got a pedicure?"  :]

After our pedicures we hopped in the car and drove into the city for lunch at one of my favorite places, La Bonne Soupe.  It's this wonderful, cramped, authentic French place that has become pretty popular since we first went in 2010 (when everyone was speaking French & we couldn't read the menu).  They have the best "onion soup" I've ever tasted.  The food is delicious and the service is quick.  We were too full for dessert after the soup, ham & swiss crepe (me) & lamb burger (him) and I was bummed because I wanted the chocolate tart... next time!

Once we were sufficiently stuffed, we saw a play!  I love being able to see a Broadway every now & again.  Chicago has been on my list for some time and after getting the green light from a friend, we went for it!  I thought it was great and had really great music, and the girl who played Roxie was adorable!  Mckay didn't love it like I did, but I didn't really expect him to.

The show ended and we raced back to Connecticut for sweet Tillie Rose's 1st birthday party.  We absolutely adore that little lady & think her parents are pretty great too.  We blew out birthday candles together and got to hang out with some of our favorite people. 

It was a birthday that was practically perfect in every way!